Save the last dance for me review (Scarborough 2013)

Save the last dance for me review (Scarborough 2013)

 

I really thought that I would enjoy this show; after all, I loved Dreamboats and Petticoats which is from the same team.

But whereas Dreamboats had charm, humour and emotion, this show was sadly lacking in charm and humour, and the story was devoid of any emotional attachment at all.

The songs in this show were as good as in Dreamboats, but the delivery of them was poor, it was rather like amateur night at the local YMCA, rather than the professional production that it claimed to be.

The story is lame, and the songs just keep popping up for no reason, rather than progressing the storyline.

The best song in the show is, as you would expect, save the last dance for me, but after two and a half hours, I was past caring, and was ready for off. Several people were on their feet at the end, but not for an encore, they were rapidly heading for the exit.

 

5/10

Amsterdam holiday 2013 (Day 4).

Thursday 15 August

Unfortunately Katy was not feeling too well this morning, so after checking out we sat in the hotel lobby playing knockout whist.

Once Katy was on the mend we went out for a walk to Begijnhof, which used to be a refuge for pious women. Maybe there are not so many pious women around these days, as these houses are now occupied by low-income female senior citizens. This is a rather odd tourist attraction, as it brings in loads of tourists, to what is effectively someone’s place of residence.

After exploring this pretty area, we went to The Amsterdam Museum. This massive historical museum is on the site of a former orphanage, and, as you would expect, tells the story of Amsterdam. This museum would interest locals more than tourists, but still has plenty to fascinate any casual museum-goer. It’s bigger than it looks, and we all managed to lose each other. Where would we be without our mobile phones? We eventually met up again in the courtyard, and went in search of somewhere to eat, and found ourselves in Tomaz, which is promoted as being an oasis of calm in the bustling centre of Amsterdam. It was, in fact, a very fine café, although as with most cafes in the city, service is rather slow. This wouldn’t have been too much of a problem, had we not booked a taxi to the airport from the hotel at 4.30pm. The food arrived at 4.10pm! With just ten minutes to eat, and ten minutes to scamper back to the hotel, we all ended up hot, bothered and breathless, although the taxi driver was quite laid back, so we had time to cool down before setting off back to airport with time to spare for our 7.15pm flight home.

We arrived back at Leeds/Bradford at 7.30pm local time, after four magical days in Amsterdam, a civilised, cultural city which I would recommend to anyone considering a city break.

Ansterdam Holiday 2013 (Day 3).

Wednesday 14 August

Day three in Amsterdam began with French toast for breakfast, followed by a short stroll to the Katten Kabinet (cat museum). The Cat Cabinet offers a wide look at the role of the cat in art and in culture through the centuries, and was a real treat for me. Everything here is cat related; there were even two resident cats in the foyer. The Cat Cabinet was founded in commemoration of the ginger cat John Pierpont Morgan (1966-1983). This special cat was the stubborn, headstrong companion of the museum's founder, Bob Meijer.

The only downside was that the gallery was really rather small, and only kept our attention for half an hour or so.

We headed back along Herengracht until we reached the museum of bags and purses, a museum that is exclusively dedicated to bags and purses. Now this may not sound all that thrilling, but I was surprisingly impressed with this attraction, and both Katy and Kate really enjoyed it. There was a lot to see, and we spent over an hour looking at the weird and wacky exhibits, such as bags in the shape of cupcakes, telephones and even The Titanic! Not only was this a fabulous museum, they had an amazing tearoom, where we stayed for a lovely pot of Lady Grey tea, and chocolate mocha cake!

After a splendid lunch we walked to Waterlooplein to explore the famous flea market. This bustling market sells everything from Che Guevara posters to bicycle parts, and African drums to military uniforms. The busy square is named after the battle of Waterloo, and stands near to the impressive Amstel River. None of us were tempted to buy anything, so we carried on to The Hortus Botanicus, one of the oldest botanic gardens in the world. Located in the city centre of the Dutch capital, the garden is a beautiful and intimate place with a unique collection of plants. As it was a warm summer’s day, this was a wonderful place to spend the afternoon. I was particularly impressed with the butterfly house, and the small Mexican greenhouse.

Desperate for a cold beer, we were lucky to find one of Asterdam’s famous bars, Café de Sluyswacht. This iconic sloping house overlooks the widest canal in Amsterdam, the Oudeschans, with a great view of The Montelbaanstoren, a 500 year old tower. We sat outside on the terrace watching the canal boats go by, whilst enjoying the late afternoon sunshine.

Rob and Kate went off to do their own thing, while Katy and I went for a cone of chips at Waterlooplein market, before setting off back to the hotel. As usual there were cheeses, breads, crisps and other nibbles on offer, along with some very welcome chilled white wine.

In the evening Katy and I walked down to Rembrantplein, which at night is brash and bustling with locals, and tourists looking for food and drink. We settled on La Madonnina, an ok looking Italian restaurant with seats outside, overlooking the square. The food, when it arrived, was very average, and the staff looked totally disinterested. I even saw one standing near our table having a cigarette, while texting on his phone. I checked later on Trip Advisor, and read that this restaurant is one to be avoided at all costs. What a pity I hadn’t seen the reviews earlier!

After dinner we walked round the square, and I saw one place with long queues waiting to get in, so, of course, I had to go and see what is was. It turned out to be a Magnum pleasure store! Here you can create your own Magnum, and the staff will make it up for you while you wait. A great idea, but we didn’t fancy queueing for an ice cream, so instead we popped into a nearby newsagents, where I was able to buy a Crème Brulee Magnum. Magic on a stick!

Later back at the hotel I enjoyed a whisky nightcap, to round off a wonderful day in Amsterdam’s capital city.

Amsterdam holiday 2013 (Day 2).

Tuesday 13 August

We came down for breakfast, which was continental, although a delightful egg chef would cook you eggs in whatever way you requested. Fried, scrambled, boiled etc. I chose an omelette which was cooked freshly in front of me, and served directly to my table. Marvellous.

After breakfast the four of took a tram to The Rijksmuseum, which is one of Amsterdam’s biggest attractions. It had been closed for renovations for ten years, and only re-opened in April 2013. The most famous painting in the gallery is Rembrandt’s masterpiece, The Night Watch, and this is brilliantly displayed in its own gallery, the Night Watch Room, at the end of the Hall of Fame. This museum also houses The Milkmaid by Johannes Vermeer, another Dutch work of genius.

This museum is one of Europe’s best, without a doubt, but suffers from being too busy, and too noisy. It is also difficult to find your way around, and some paintings attract crowds which can be ten deep, or even more for the really famous paintings. My other gripe was that you had to queue for everything. Queue to get in to the main gallery, queue to hand in your coat, queue for toilets, queue for the café and so on. Also, the information panels next to each painting were too small, and I couldn’t always get close enough to read them.

We decided to leave the gallery for lunch, and headed off to find somewhere quieter. We ended up at an eatery called Pompa, which looked ok. I chose bread and cheese, expecting a Dutch Ploughman’s lunch, but literally got two thin pieces of cheese, along with some dry bread. Katy’s meal was forgotten, as was part of Rob’s order.

Katy and I went to Vondelpark after lunch, and enjoyed strolling round Amsterdam’s finest park. There is an urban myth surrounding this park that says that starting in September 2008, adults were planned to be legally allowed to have sex in the park, as long as they "take their garbage with them afterwards and never have intercourse near the playground, and the sex must be limited to the evening hours and night". We didn’t see any lovers, but I was delighted to see grey herons, rose-ringed parakeets, and some Egyptian geese. After an ice cream in the park, we took a tram back to the hotel, and arrived in time for cheese and bread, which was much better than my disappointing lunch.

After a few complimentary beers we took a tram to the city centre. I had read about an underground glow in the dark crazy golf course in a pub named Noah’s Arq, and I was keen to check it out. We found the pub opposite the waterfront, and sure enough, there was a golf course in the cellar. Armed with our 3D glasses, we descended to the pub’s basement and had great fun putting our fluorescent balls around 15 of the wackiest crazy golf holes you we ever see. This was excellent entertainment, and highly recommended.

We then took a bus back to the centre, and decided to explore the red light district before dinner. It didn’t feel seedy here at all, just full of tourists like us checking out the area. If anything, it was simply a pleasant stroll along another of Amsterdam’s many canals.

We found a restaurant down an alleyway that was surprisingly upmarket. It was called Blauw aan de Wal (Blue on the quay). Normally you would need to book to get in here, but we were shown to a table up on the second floor. Although this is a top restaurant, there were only two choices of starter on the menu, and likewise only two choices of main course. I went with some sort of salmon and oysters concoction as my starter, but I wasn’t keen on the texture. For main I got raw tuna in ginger broth, and was similarly unimpressed. To be fair, everyone else in our party were impressed with their meals, so maybe it was just too posh for me!

By the time we left Blue on the Quay, the red light district was absolutely buzzing with punters and tourists. We made our way back through the throng to the tram station, and arrived back at our hotel around midnight, just in time for a port and lemon nightcap.

Amsterdam holiday 2013 (Day 1).

Monday 12 August

Got up at 4 o’clock in the morning, and Rob drove us to Leeds/Bradford airport, ready for our 7am flight to Amsterdam. We arrived at Schiphol at 9.15 local time, and took a packed train into Central Station. It was standing room only on the train, which was covered in graffiti both inside and out! From the station we hailed a taxi to take us to our hotel, Banks Mansion. This fabulous boutique hotel is situated on the banks of Amsterdam’s finest canal, the Herengracht (Gentlemen’s canal). It was too early to check in, so we left our bags and headed off to Rembrantplein for an al fresco breakfast at L’Opera.

After a welcome breakfast, we walked round to the floating flower markets, alongside the Singel canal. As well as the flower markets, there were lots of shops specialising in Dutch cheeses, with plenty of free samples too! There were also shops here selling all kinds of dope, which of course is legal in Amsterdam.

We decided to take a one hour canal cruise next, to help us find our way around. This was a great idea, although the boat was nearly full and very warm inside. Nevertheless we got to see lots of the sights, several canals, and The IJ, Amsterdam’s busy waterfront. (The IJ, pronounced eye, simply means water in English). Amsterdam has over 100 canals, and over 1,000 bridges, so we only got to see a small percentage, but many more than we would have done on foot!

After the boat trip we fancied a Dutch delicacy, chips with mayonnaise, and found them at The Chipsy King. Dutch service is quite laid back, to say the least, and the fries took an age to be served up, but they were delicious!

It was now time to check in, so we set off back to our hotel, and were told that we had been given a complimentary upgrade to a room with a canal view. We were also informed that everything was included in our stay, including drinks from the bar! After unpacking, we were treated to complimentary refreshments and nibbles. This included a selection of Dutch cheeses, a range of meats, olives, freshly baked breads, along with a crisp Sauvignon Blanc. Several wines and beers later, we headed out to Café Luxembourg for dinner. This stylish café is one of Amsterdam’s most famous venues, and was named “one of the world’s great cafes” by The New York Times. It lived up to expectations, and I enjoyed a superb Dover Sole, which was absolutely delicious, and came with yet more frites and mayo.

After dinner, we walked around by the Singel canal, and ended up in O’Malley’s Irish bar, listening to old sixties music. We eventually found our hotel again, and enjoyed our complimentary nightcaps, Tia Maria for me.

A perfect end to a wonderful first day in Amsterdam.

Hairspray review.

Hairspray review (Leeds)

I originally booked tickets to see Hairspray in Bradford in December 2011, however even though I travelled there from Scarborough, the cast were stuck in the snow, and the performance was cancelled.

Taking no chances this time, I booked tickets for a matinee in August.

This show has one of the best openings to any show, with Good Morning Baltimore being an all-time favourite of mine. It is a great feel good show tune and sets the scene brilliantly.

Of course, Hairspray is renowned as being the most happy, funny, sunny show in town, and the story of Tracy Turnblad is well known to anyone who has seen the classic movie.

Tracy was played by newcomer Freya Sutton, and was brilliant in the role. I was disappointed though that two of the show’s stars, Mark Benton and Marcus Collins were indisposed, as I feel that audiences in the suburbs are often short changed in this way.

Much of the music is not as good as the opening number, and I felt that some of the songs were rather too loud, and often shouted out, rather than sung.

That said, the last fifteen minutes of Hairspray is excellent, and overall this is a very good show. It is impossible not to leave the theatre with a massive grin on your face, and it is impossible not to fall head over heels in love with Tracy Turnblad.

7/10

Talbot Hotel Malton.

Talbot Hotel: Malton.

 

Visiting a hotel for the first time is rather like going to see a three act play at the theatre. You arrive full of excitement and anticipation, and settle down for the show. The first act often bowls you over with spectacle and sensory overload, the second act often fails to follow this up, and the third act leaves you feeling like you’ve seen it all before.

Modern hotels are all front. They wow you with an enormous foyer, often with a grand staircase and maybe even a chandelier, then when you get to your room, you are disappointed, as it’s all rather bland, and you get that sense of déjà vu, where you feel sure that you’ve stayed in this same hotel room many times before.

The Talbot Hotel in Malton, North Yorkshire is very different to just about any hotel that I’ve ever stayed in. From the outside the hotel looks rather unprepossessing, with its regular Georgian exterior, and they don’t bother with any fancy reception area, it’s tucked away in an alcove under the stairs.

But when you arrive at your room, that is when you see difference. I stayed in the Lambton, one of the hotel’s feature rooms. As soon as you enter you are aware that this hotel simply oozes style. The furniture and soft furnishings look so inviting that you can’t wait to get stretched out on the comfortable sofa. There are four feature rooms at the hotel and each room has been individually designed and is upholstered to its own theme with unique wall paper and colour schemes. All of the feature rooms are appointed with 6ft beds (Rockingham has a four poster bed), garden views, feature artwork, luxury marble bathrooms with shower and bath. Original room features including chandeliers and fireplaces

There are no tea making facilities in the rooms, the Talbot believe that if you want tea or coffee, you want it freshly made, so you simply ring reception and within ten minutes, they will deliver to your room, either a pot of hot tea, with plenty of fresh milk too, and a sugar bowl complete with tongs, or coffee which arrives freshly percolated in a cafetiere. Surprisingly there is no extra cost for this service. If you prefer, you can take your tea in the sumptuous drawing room. This room is an absolute delight with current magazines, and daily papers available to read while you enjoy your drinks. There is also a selection of games here too.

If the foyer is act one, and the rooms act two, then wait for the final act to unfold, which is the incredible James Martin menu. Unlike chain hotels which leave you feeling underwhelmed, the Talbot’s food will have you on your feet applauding wildly, and shouting for more.

I ate in the restaurant on my first night, and yes, James Martin really is the executive chef. Everything on the menu has been prepared by the great man himself. I went for the Gressingham duck for starters, which looked amazing and tasted superb. For main course I tried the halibut with wilted spinach. The fish was cooked superbly, and the taste was incredible. Other meals on the menu included pan fried wreck fish, and Riggwelter beer braised beef cheek. The buttermilk panna cotta with Yorkshire rhubarb was the perfect end to my meal, which, by the way, only costs £39 for three courses, and is available to non-residents too.

There is a small, but well stocked bar in the hotel, which serves Black Sheep ale. I can particularly recommend the 2010 Riesling naked grape, which is a very delightful German wine.

Breakfast at the Talbot is another feather in the cap. Not just fresh fruit but specialties such as earl grey prunes, and sweet spice apricots grace the menu. Everything is locally sourced, Whitby kippers, Kirkbymoorside salmon, and even the honey was from a local beekeeper. A full Talbot was exactly that, and the Talbot bacon buttie contained loads of bacon with homemade spicy chutney in a huge toasted bap. Toast was exactly as it should be, warm, and served with butter at room temperature. A small thing maybe, but one which most hotels get very wrong.

On my second night I ate in the conservatory. This is the more informal option, with a limited menu at everyday prices. The conservatory area is a wonderful space, which is flooded with natural light from the glass roof. It’s cool, airy and spacious, and feels like sitting outside on a pleasant summer’s evening. I went for the fish and chips, served Talbot style on a wooden bread board with minted crushed peas, and rapeseed oil tartare. Wonderful! This was followed by the white chocolate and whisky croissant butter pudding with vanilla ice cream. A culinary delight, and with change from £20.

If you don’t want to stay at the hotel during the day time, the Coastliner bus stops right outside and will take you directly to the cosmopolitan city of Leeds, or to historic York. If the seaside is more your thing, then different buses will take you to either Whitby, Scarborough or Bridlington. If you have your own transport then try Castle Howard, one of the world’s top ten magnificent houses, which is only five miles down the road.

The staff at the Talbot were all excellent, and genuinely seem to care about their customers. If any member of staff sees you carrying luggage, they offer to help, if they see you in the drawing room, they will offer you tea, and if they see you in the bar they will chat with you.

The Talbot deservedly has an excellent reputation, and I can see why, it is a luxury hotel in every sense of the word, and a hotel I can recommend wholeheartedly.

The Mousetrap theatre review; York. (May 2013).

I’ve waited sixty years to find out whodunit in Dame Agatha Christie’s famous play, The Mousetrap, and by the interval I realised that I couldn’t care less!

Maybe in 1953 when this murder mystery was first performed, theatregoers expectation were much lower than they are today. This trivial piece may have worked in the fifties, but it sure doesn’t work anymore. I was bored witless within half an hour, and worked out who the killer was long before the dénouement.

How this very average production has survived for so long, I have no idea, but maybe now that it’s finally been on tour, it will be mercifully put to sleep. It was reminiscent of watching a very ordinary am dram play in a church hall on a cold winter’s evening in the seventies, and I’ve sat through plenty of those over the years!

I can’t recommend anything at all about this rancid play. Give it a miss!

4/10

The Lion King theatre review (Manchester: Jan 2013)

The Lion King review (Manchester: Jan 2013)

I paid £75 for a ticket to see The Lion King, and guess what? It was worth every penny!

This show is a spectacle like no other. The first ten minutes were an assault on the senses like nothing I have ever seen before in Britain. Elephants, lions, zebras, monkeys, hyenas and all manner of animals appear from every corner of the theatre. Of course, these are not real animal, but actors in costume, but the acting, the choreography, the music and the costume make you believe.

I was quickly transported to the Serengeti where the story began to enfold. Simba is born to be king (the lion king) but events change his destiny. His father is killed, his uncle takes over and Simba is cast out. This is where he meets his chums Timon and Pumbaa, a meerkat and a warthog. There are plenty of comic moments here, but be aware there are some distressing scenes which may upset younger children.

The music in The Lion King is uplifting, but not memorable like Phantom or Les Mis.

The strength of this show is not the music, but the sheer spectacle, a “gasp-inducing spectacle” as Time Magazine so aptly said.

The Lion King is highly recommended and is on at The Palace till April, and ticket prices start at £20, so if you live in the north, then you’ve no excuse not to pop over and see this magnificent show.

I’m giving it ten out of ten, although I did overhear a little girl on the way out of the theatre saying “I’m giving it fifty nine out of ten, Daddy.” She’s probably right.

10/10

Cathedral Quarter Hotel (Derby).

Katy and I travelled down to Derby on the train on a busy Saturday, and upon arrival we made our way to the Cathedral Quarter hotel, a fine designer boutique hotel set in the old police station. The hotel, as its name implies, is in the shadow of Derby’s fabulously impressive Cathedral, and a mere stone’s throw from the city centre.
First impressions were ok, and we headed off to enjoy the delights of Derby. In the evening after a busy day we were hoping for a quiet drink back at the hotel, but as another guest so aptly wrote on Trip Advisor “Saturday night was party night.... I know this because I was made startlingly aware of the music as I turned into the hotel road by the cathedral, about 100m away”.
The tiny resident’s bar was packed, as was the cocktail lounge, and partygoers spilled out into the foyer area. Our trendy boutique hotel turned out to be as busy and noisy as any Bigg Market pub in Newcastle’s city centre, on a typical Saturday night out. Not only that, but when I finally got to the bar, I discovered that they didn’t sell blended whisky, so my hopes of a warming whisky mac were quickly dashed!
The following morning had us very confused as the clocks had gone back, and we couldn’t for the life of us figure out what time it was. Nevertheless, we made it down to the restaurant for breakfast, and had time to look round Derby one last time, before our train was due.

Derby Ghostfest.

My wife and I travelled down to Derby on the train on a busy Saturday, and upon arrival we made our way to the Cathedral Quarter hotel, a fine designer boutique hotel set in the old police station. The hotel, as its name implies, is in the shadow of Derby’s fabulously impressive Cathedral, and a mere stone’s throw from the city centre.

Katy had spotted an outdoor market on our way to the hotel, so we headed there first. Within minutes we had bought Christmas gifts galore, and had to go to Bennett’s department store for a sit down and a spot of afternoon tea. Bennetts is an amazing place, rather like The Paradise transported to the 21^st century. The tea rooms were truly sumptuous, rather like stepping into a rococo painting, and are highly recommended, should you ever find yourself in Derby.

Refreshed, we made our way to the museum and art gallery. This building looks somewhat unprepossessing from the outside, but contains far more treasures than you might imagine. For a start, they have the world’s largest collection of Joseph Wright paintings, which are a treat to behold, and then they have the most incredible museum of artefacts, which could easily keep anyone enthralled for days. I was particularly impressed with the natural history displays.

So far, so good, you might say, but what about the ghost festival?

Well, this was scheduled for the evening in the market place, an outdoor event. As it was an incredibly cold night, we left it till the last minute before taking our seats. Wrapped up in our winter coats, complete with woolly hat, scarf, and gloves we sat back waiting to be entertained.

The event was billed as a night like no other, with readings from Derek Acorah, theories from Richard Felix, séances, table tipping, glass divination, a lone vigil, and a human pendulum. I was expecting something along the lines of the circus of horrors, but it was nothing like that at all.

The night began with Derek Acorah wandering around the audience, picking out some poor soul, and telling them that he had a message from the other side! Now, maybe I’m just cynical, but I could not believe any of this stuff, and after half a dozen of these readings, I was starting to get rather fidgety. Next came the glass divination, where volunteers were plucked from the shivering audience, to stand around a table on the makeshift stage, with one finger on an upturned glass. Suddenly the glass moved towards some helpless individual, which Derek Acorah insisted was yet another message from someone recently passed over. I don’t think I have ever been more bored at any stage show in my life, but then, I am really more of an Oklahoma man, if truth be told!

The readings from Richard Felix would have sent me to sleep had I been in a warm theatre, but as the temperature continued to plummet, I just sat there shivering. Shivering with the cold weather I hasten to add, and not with fright! Needless to say, we did a runner at the interval. I was hoping for a quiet drink back at the hotel, but as another guest so aptly wrote on Trip Advisor “Saturday night was party night.... I know this because I was made startlingly aware of the music as I turned into the hotel road by the cathedral, about 100m away”.

The tiny resident’s bar was packed, as was the cocktail lounge, and partygoers spilled out into the foyer area. Our trendy boutique hotel turned out to be as busy and noisy as any Bigg Market pub in Newcastle’s city centre, on a typical Saturday night out. Not only that, but when I finally got to the bar, I discovered that they didn’t sell blended whisky, so my hopes of a warming whisky mac were quickly dashed!

The following morning had us very confused as the clocks had gone back, and we couldn’t for the life of us figure out what time it was. Nevertheless, we made it down to the restaurant in time for breakfast, and had time to look round Derby one last time, before our train was due.